Sunday, April 1, 2012

Gender bending, male or female?

Lying deep within a mountain in the New Mexico desert is the clandestine headquarters of BIOS, the Bureau of Inanimate Object Sexing. Behind massive steel doors designed to protect good citizens from even accidentally overhearing conversations that are not suitable for pregnant women, children, and many others whose constitutions are of a frail and sensitive nature. Within these rooms, words like coupling, shrouds, hermaphrodite, bisexual, and androgyny are casually bandied around with impunity. Sexing inanimate objects is an important, but difficult and extremely taxing job. Because of the constant sexual pressure BIOS staff must always be carefully monitored by psychologists, and hand washing stations are always located close at hand for the safety of all.