Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Pulitzer Prize rejection


From: Pulitzer Prize Journalism Jury
Subject: Your Pulitzer Prize  journalism entries

Dear Mr Bishop,

Only very grudgingly have we accepted your journalism entry, primarily because you paid the entry fees. We want you to know that despite your fervent assertion you have the word "Newsy" in The Marine Installers Rant's nameplate, it does not automatically qualify your publication for inclusion in the journalism category.

That being said, we have several other issues with your submitted boating related "exposés." One of the tenets of good journalism is to be concise. We can only advise you that your writing style can only be described as very windy at the minimum. We couldn't come up with printable adjectives for the maximum.

We also noted the use of many obviously made up medical syndromes such WBS (wet butt syndrome), CS (cyclops syndrome), RPS (random placement syndrome), and many others.  

One of our jurors was in particular upset with your terminology  "Whiskey Tango Foxtrot." Dressing this euphemistic pig up does not make it any less pejorative, and the use of nater nater is never becoming to a professional journalist.

Mr. Bishop, the list is long and includes your use of fictional personages, made up quotes, delusive leads, and poor news story construction. We suggest that if you want to continue in your tenuous journalism career that you might try submitting your material to the Weekly World News. Since Edwin Newman has left, and Bat Boy is going to retire, there may be an opportunity there for you. You might also try the Huffington Post, we understand they pay the same.

With regards,

Pulitzer Prize Journalism Jury




3 comments:

  1. I'm a former newspaper reporter and I think your writing is first rate. On the other hand, I never won the Pulitzer, either.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Keep swinging Bill, even a broken clock is right twice a day.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You should try for the Peace Prize, Bill. They'll give that to anybody!

    ReplyDelete

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